Nothing But Speedos: A gay erotic short story

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And perhaps we should stop being so judgmental. Peter Travis – who went on to design the interior of the Australian parliament building – expressed regret that his creation should have become a source of ridicule. “I’ve heard people saying things like, ‘Oh that fat old man looks terrible in Speedos,’ and I don’t like that,” he once told an Australian paper. “The point is, he looks just as bad in anything, but he shouldn’t be criticised because he wants to wear something to swim in. He’s not there for people to look at. Why shouldn’t a person who wants to swim wear that and not be criticised?” Over the years, the style of speedo has changed very little. The biggest change came in the 1970s when they began to be made from Lycra rather than cotton. This made them much more figure-hugging and, as a result, they became even more popular!

Some men feel comfortable and confident wearing a tight-fitting pair, regardless of their size. Others prefer to go for a looser fit, as they feel self-conscious about their penis size. But he holds some hope that the skimpy brief is becoming more acceptable, especially given the attention that even young British men give to honing their bodies. “That iconic Daniel Craig coming out of the water moment wasn’t quite a Speedo but it was a tight number. I think that helped change things.” It was then that all three of Jordan’s new tormentor’s produced a selection of old wooden paddles, both fraternity paddles with greek letters or old fashioned domestic paddles with quaint phrases on them. The swimming pool was next to a derelict building, which had once been a sports centre, where Bruno carried the struggling and protesting Jordan, followed by a broadly grinning Dewey and Sammy.It’s certainly what I wore to my swimming lessons in the 1980s. But my 1990s teenagehood coincided with a change in trends that was a blessed relief. Puberty + swimming pools + extremely tight trunks was a combination I could do without. Long swimming shorts – Bermudas – appeared (around the same time as The Simpsons, Cherry 7-Up and Global Hypercolour T-shirts). Then, almost overnight, it became unthinkable to swim in anything except long shorts. By the mid-00s, the Speedo was only marginally less out there than the mankini. The pool was entirely empty when Jordan dived in and swam a full length under water. For the first time in weeks, Jordan felt a sense of freedom and relief as his skimmed through the cool deep water, wuith the sleekness and agility of a fit young otter. Swimming was the one thing in the world at which he was the most accomplished, and if had had the determination and self discipline to overcome his naturally lazy and self indulgent nature, he could potentially have been a world class athlete. The best way to avoid getting a wedgie is to choose the right size speedo. If your speedo is too big, then it will be more likely to ride up your butt and give you a wedgie. Conversely, if your speedo is too small, then it will be uncomfortable and dig into your skin. The key is to find a speedo that fits you well and is comfortable to wear.

It took a moment for the powder to take effect, and then, suddenly, Jordan became aware of the most extreme and infuriating itching sensation he had ever experienced. He struggled and writhed in extreme discomfort, desperate to pull off his speedos and try to brush the vile substance off himself, but could do nothing as his hands were tied to the beam above his head. But if you are wearing your speedo to a pool party or the beach, then you might want to consider shaving your pubes. Why? Because hair can often get caught in the fabric, which can be uncomfortable and even painful. Jordan had no idea what was planned for the fair, but hoped he would at least be allowed to wear clothes. Meanwhile today, it was just a relief to have some cover albeit only his tiny blue speedos.Ever wondered about the psychology behind color choices? Discover what the most attractive color to wear for a man is in our related article. Until too late Jordan had not noticed how large and muscular Bruno was, otherwise he might have been more cautious, but before he could react Dewey’s big brother had grabbed him and thrown him over his shoulder. “We are going to have some fun with you!” he growled

Barker now wears them on holiday in Europe, but never in Los Angeles, where he resides. The surf culture plus that peculiarly adolescent strain of American puritanism dictates that men wear shorts. Speedo has now become a household name and is synonymous with style, performance, and quality. But most men still find the idea of wearing one a little daunting! One of the best-known beach inspectors was Aubrey Laidlaw, who had already laid down the law when the first bikini debuted on the beach in 1946. By the turn of the 1960s, the “Bikini Wars” were in full swing. Laidlaw and his inspectorate patrolled the beach with tape measures, methodically escorting scantily clad women away. But one morning in 1961, he saw something that astonished even him – men in Speedo trunks. He called the police and had them arrested for indecent exposure.These body-hanging trunks can actually be quite flattering, and once you know how to wear them, they can be a great addition to your summer wardrobe. Luke Day’s parents moved to Australia when he was six, and as soon as school finished each day, he was in his Speedo briefs in the pool. “My dad was always a Speedo man. Everyone around was. It wasn’t even a thing,” he recalls. “But then when I was in my teens, I would wear them outside Australia and people would go: ‘Woah! You’re wearing Speedos?’ Americans are horrified by them. I didn’t get it at all. Isn’t that what everyone wears?” Whatever your instinctive feelings towards the Speedo swimming brief, you can tell that it is a design classic because the brand has become synonymous with the product – like “hoover” for vacuum cleaner. Other brands are, of course, available – and Speedo the company sells the full range of aquatic attire – but when someone says “Speedo” what comes to mind is, well, budgie smugglers. Tom Daley, incidentally, now wears Adidas trunks.

The exalted status of the swim brief in gay iconography goes some way to explaining why it is viewed with such fear and loathing elsewhere. In 2018, a man named Chris Donohoe complained that he was the victim of homophobia after being thrown out of a pool party at a hotel in Las Vegas for flouting the “no Speedo” rule. “It so obviously targets LGBTQ+ and non-gender-conforming people,” he argued. “They need to stop policing people based on their gender identity and sexuality.” Speedos come in a variety of different styles. Some are designed for swimming, while others are more leisurely. Some have a low waist, while others sit higher on the hips. This really depends on personal preference. Some men like to shave their pubes before wearing a speedo, as it makes them feel more comfortable and confident. Others love it bushy, as they feel that the hair provides extra coverage and protection. Ultimately, it is up to you to decide what feels best for you. If you want maximum coverage, then choose a speedo style with an internal drawstring. This will help to keep your penis in place and prevent it from riding up the inside of your leg. If you're going for a more revealing look, then opt for a style without an internal drawstring. Remember to choose a speedo that's tight enough to stay in place but not so tight that it's uncomfortable.Nonetheless, the swimming brief has always had its strongholds – in Australia, as well as in Italy, Greece and France, where many an English teenager has been dismayed to discover that tight swimming trunks are compulsory in public swimming pools. The logic is that it is unhygienic to swim in shorts that may have been used to play football in, sit on the grass in, barbecue in, and so on. I’d guess that a handful of Brexit votes were swung by this rule alone. It’s designed as a purely functional object. You shouldn’t have anything around your waist that would twist when you swim’ When Jordan objected, a further strip of tape was placed over his mouth, effectively silencing him. A large number of the fire ants had slipped between his cheeks and they set about biting that intimate and sensitive area, even his rosebud like anus was not spared. Walk tall, hold your head up high, and own your look. Remember, you are wearing a speedo because you want to look and feel good. If you walk around with confidence, people will take notice.