Nice Girls Don't Get The Corner Office: 101 unconscious mistakes women make...

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Especially for underrepresented minorities and women, titles give more legitimacy to our career paths that people may skim over due to conscious or unconscious bias if they weren’t there. Being Overly Concerned with Offending Others: if you expressed yourself without being offensive, then don’t fall for it, it’s a ploy Don't always feel the need to help. "Because women are taught early in their lives that others must know more than they do, so knowledge and self-confidence must be gained externally. Helping others is one way capable women gain external validation for their self-worth." SO TRUE. Using Minimizing Words: never minimize your work and achievements and the efforts it took. Instead, say “I’m pleased with how it turned out”

Acquiescing to Bullies: use “I statements” to let them know how you feel. Nobody can argue when you say “I feel like I’m not being heard”Maybe this book and this attitude works in some corporations, but I believe you can be a successful woman without completely erasing your feminine personality to act more like a man. There are chapters where the author specifically said to put aside any femininity, to dress like a man and wear only dark colors because that's what men do.

Don't be the office conscience. Obviously, if something is heinously wrong, tell someone, but you need to weigh the benefit of pointing out minor infractions against the possible consequences.Believing Others Know More than You: probe authority, ask how do they know it, or based on what they say it

This has got to be the most confusing book I've read lately. I mean, most advice is good, common sense advice: don't be vulgar, don't be passive aggressive, don't shy away in a corner, don't think you're a victim or play a victim, don't overdo with makeup, don't dress like you're going to a frat party, network with people, ask for help. All really good stuff. But there are others that I have trouble accepting: be a woman more like a man. And that's not really empowering. Although in the beginning the author does say that you don't need to be a man to succeed in the business world, most examples are "have you ever seen a man do/say ..." And to me that reads as: if you want to be successful, you have to put aside all your femininity, all your qualities that you're proud of and act like a man. As a creative personality, I have trouble accepting that if I want to expand my career in the corporate world, I need to act more like a bland, boring individual who's part of a boys club than use my creative side to showcase my skills and abilities. Practice saying no more often, even if you feel guilty or uncomfortable at first. You shouldn’t feel guilty about having your needs met and setting fair boundaries. Stop volunteering for low-profile/low-impact assignments. Recognize when people delegate inappropriately to you, and start delegating to others better yourself. If you are someone’s manager or supervisor, avoid people delegating up to you because they claim not to know how to perform a certain task or say they don’t have the time. You probably don’t either, and it’s not your task to take on, so try to suggest that they ask a colleague for assistance or use it as an opportunity to teach them so that the next time that a similar task pops up they have the capability to do it themselves. Doing the Work of Others: “Promotions are rewards for getting the job done, not necessarily doing the job”

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Don’t misunderstand overcoming your “Nice Girl” phase and becoming more empowered, assertive, and confident, with being mean or nasty.

And she also provided me with great ideas for my own article and products. That’s the biggest compliment I can give to any author. Think about what you want and why you want it. When asking for it, be straightforward, direct, and try to accompany your request with a couple of legitimate reasons why you should be given what you’re requesting. Obediently Following Instructions: don’t put your head down to work right away to show you’re such a good employee. Instead, ask questions and consider how it can be done faster, and better

In the United States, Hispanic women make only 59 percent of what Hispanic men earn for the same job. And while Caucasian women fare better, they still earn only 77 percent compared to their male co-workers. Furthermore, in the first year after they finish college, female graduates already earn 8 percent less than their male peers; two decades down the line, the gap increases to 20 percent. When trying to break those patterns however, it is not uncommon to encounter friction or resistance, usually from male counterparts who are not comfortable with us breaking from our girl roles and becoming more assertive (although you might be more familiar with getting the term “bitchy” or “difficult”).The reactions we get are uncomfortable and difficult to cope with. To avoid that, we often rather play the “nice girl”, rather than asserting ourselves and asking for our needs to be met. Try to discover where the inordinate need to be liked comes from, and learn to set boundaries. By learning to set boundaries, you won’t have to worry about anyone taking advantage of you again. 3. Being reluctant to negotiate and waiting to be given what you want. Particularly within the start-up landscape, it is not unusual to hear the “we don’t worry about titles” trope. And yes, we might work on many different areas of responsibility and our scope of tasks might be broad as hell, but be a little too lax when it comes to your job title for long enough and you might end up finding yourself in a position where your title doesn’t match your scope of responsibility, along with the confusion that comes along with it.